.....I don't mind

Yogis,

Life is like a roller coaster. You are buckled in and still, yet the world rushes by. The scenery in constant flux from the changing of the seasons, to the movement of the hands on the clock. The flow of people in and out of life and the irritating ever changing rules of fashion. Nothing in the external world static. Everything impermanent.

And this is why we suffer…….

It matters not if our perception of the hill we are climbing is that of perfection, because in another moment we will crest the top with only that brief still point, before the stomach dropping fall begins. We suffer. If taking that sharp curve at a high rate of speed feels uncomfortable, wait a moment and that too will change. The track cares not if we ‘like it’ or not. It simply is.

Like the handlebar, we white knuckle that which we love and push away with all our might all we have deemed to be wrong. Both are impermanent and both actions cause us tension. Nothing static. Like the ride, life has a beginning and an end, and we can’t control the twists and turns no matter how hard we attempt to steer. It isn’t the ride that produces suffering, it is our resistance.

During the women’s retreat someone shared a quote they had read by J. Krishnamurti, the great Indian philosopher and spiritual teacher.  After sharing his messages for over fifty years he boiled it all down to one sentence.  "This is my secret," he said. "I don't mind what happens."

WHAT??? How can that be? How can someone possibly not mind when stuck in traffic, sick with the flu or having financial struggles? And what about all of the troubles in our country and the world? Does he not mind when someone screams in anger at him or steals his wallet? Or the hardest…..when someone close dies leaving a large hole in their place.

I don’t mind…….

The more I sat with this simple sentence the more I realize that it is indeed the simple center of the yogic teachings. That I am not my mind, not my body and not anything that passes by me in the external world. I am an eternal spirit on the ride of life in this particular car, and when I connect to that at its deepest level, nothing on the outside can cause me to suffer. That part of me is unchanging and doesn’t mind.

Notice how the quote is not “I don’t care.” And not "I don't feel." Empathy, compassion and right action are all noble traits and make a difference to those around us when done from stillness, buckled into the “I don’t mind” mind. The place of inner peace where we can observe the world without the stories, feeling joys and sorrow deeply yet undisturbed by that next loop that turns life upside down. Allowing each moment to be what it is.

That is the path……That is the practice……  I don’t mind.

I think I will try arms in the air this time,
SARAH

.....bones of the earth

Yogis

I spend most of my life on rocks.

My home was built in 1948 on top of an old quarry, which I am reminded of every time I stick my shovel in the dirt. Even though I will have planted a foot away, I still end up wrestling some massive buried rock until it finally breaks free, leaving me panting, sweaty and covered with dirt.  

I only have to walk down my path into the woods behind the house to view the beautiful old quarry face, now sprouting ferns and even small trees from its crevices. The creek bed that runs through is lined with broken rock and is home to quaint stone bridges and an old standing fireplace, reminiscent of a time gone by.  As I lie in bed, I am held by all this rock beneath me.

When I leave the house, it is often for my daily trips to the creek or river. Both also lined with rock. In fact, our entire town is mostly stone, with four quarries originally operating within not much more than a square mile. All the trails include rock scrambling and for those learning to rock climb there are even faces on which to practice with incredible views of the river. My feet know the ways of the rocks.

This week I watched as my feet walked across rocks, felt myself sitting on rocks, and noticed the multitude of rocks that I have found over time that now sit out on display in almost every room of the

house. Rocks ground me.

Luckily, I love rocks! I always have.

It was as I was sitting on a rock taking a picture of tree roots that my eyes became drawn to the rock bed I had just walked across. Every color, shape and size. Each unique. Each amazing when looked at from a different perspective.

In drum circle this week we were reminded by our teacher that rocks are the bones of Mother Earth. They hold the ancient knowledge. There are the grandmother and grandfather stones and are even the way we mark our own passing. Ah, the stories they could tell…….

Rocks are sturdy. Rocks are still. Rocks are quiet. Rocks are strong. They are dependable and solid. Many of the qualities we work to embed within ourselves. Rocks are our foundation.

Watch for the rocks in your life this week! I know there is at least one out there that will wave to you and be grateful for being noticed.

Written in stone,
SARAH

.....voice inside my head

Yogis,
The alarm goes off. Its dark outside and I am buried under my covers, snug and warm. “You could skip today. You probably didn’t get enough sleep and you could go for a walk later. It’s cold out there” says my inner voice in a convincing tone.  I take a deep breath, push the covers off and swing my legs over the edge of the bed. A few minutes later I am in my running clothes and out the door.

I have been observing the voice inside lately. You know the one I mean? The chatter in the head that speaks to you from the moment you wake until you drift off into dreamland. The one that has a comment or judgment on absolutely everything. And if you awaken in the middle of the night, well that’s when it has the most to say.

I am realizing that it gives me pretty much the same advice almost every morning. Never does the alarm go off and it yell, “Yay, it’s morning! Jump up and get out there and run!”  It’s as if it would like to derail me from my intentions. Why is that?

I’m sure the voice sounds slightly different in each of us. Probably varying accents, tones of voice and favorite topics. For some it loves to harp on doubt, for others its favorite pastime is guilt. It loves resentment and can speak endlessly on the subject of worry. And it is overjoyed to have you as its captive audience.

I have been watching as I come up with new ideas for workshops……”no one will want to come to that”……or contemplate writing a book……’that will be overwhelming and too much work.” Even simple things like when it is time to clean out a closet…….”you should wait until tomorrow.” Finally sitting down on the couch to rest……”you’re wasting time.” It clearly doesn’t like us to make changes, step forward or move outside of our comfort zone.

It is the mind’s job to protect us, but if we allow it to hold the reins we are like the child with a hovering parent. The one who isn’t allowed to do anything for fear it may get hurt. Stuck. Stagnant. Unable to move forward in our life’s purpose.

When, however, you become very quiet and still you can begin to hear another much softer voice. The one speaking from your soul. This voice knows you are always safe, perfect and quite capable of achieving anything you choose to pursue.  It moves forward with you.

The path to detaching from the boisterous mental chatter and tuning in to ‘you’ is meditation. An ancient practice that over time helps you step back and observe, and even smile at, the unrequested advice given by the mind. Tuning your frequency into the whisper of the deeper, often buried voice that wants you to be happy and free.

As I am running back up the street toward the house the sun is beginning to lighten the sky. An owl flies over head. My heart is beating in my chest and my breath chilled by the air. I feel awake and alive……and thankful yet again that I didn’t listen to the chatter.

What does your voice tell you? Notice.

Watching the noise,
SARAH

.....we fell in

Yogis,
On an exceedingly beautiful autumn weekend, four amazing women chose to ‘fall in’ with me. The bags have now been packed, cars loaded and they are down the road, yet their energy lingers. I can still hear their voices.

It always amazes me how a random group can gather and within 2 days a bond is formed. I witness it over and over as I attend training, retreats and gatherings, and was shown it clearly yet again this weekend. There is something about sharing meals, walks, feelings and chocolate that forms a glue, allowing each one of us to crack open a little more.

Together we prepared, served, ate and cleaned up five different meals…..not an easy chore, yet it felt seamless. Like an orchestra, each taking a role, the five of us moved through the kitchen with ease. This one setting the table, while another chopped and one stirring the pot. Creative ideas shared for use of leftovers and even the seeds from the butternut squash ended up roasted and in a bowl. Goddesses.

A walk off trail at the river pushed some out of comfort zones. For others, simply signing up a brave step.  We leaned on trees, found walnuts, identified plants and stood mesmerized by the rush of the river. Late in the day the fire was lit while the sun began its descent.  We each wrote what no longer serves us, to then offer to the flames. Transformed into smoke, not unlike the transformation some in the group were seeking. Wise women.

Our beverage of choice was nourishing herbal infusions and our plates wore every color imaginable. The orange of the squash, ruby red pomegranate seeds, tri color quinoa and vivid green fennel. Eating for this Vata (air) season, our breakfasts consisted of warm cooked grains paired with nuts, seeds, nutmeg and dates. The flatbread recipe I saw in a doctor’s office magazine on Wednesday became lunch and…..oh my gosh. An orgy for both the eyes and mouth. Medicine women.

I recently saw a picture of someone’s thumb and index finger holding a piece of paper in the air by its corner. The message was that the effort is in holding on. Letting go is effortless. This is where the name ‘Falling in…” was derived. Practicing surrender. That became our discussion, vision and mantra. Not easy, but then again, not hard.

The tea kettle was always warm, rituals began to become familiar and we dared to look into each other’s eyes. Each unique, yet as we soon discovered, all the same. “Falling in…..” is in the books!

Grateful,
SARAH

PS I'm sorry but does anyone else feel like this day is going to go on forever?