.......whiplash

Yogis,

A few weeks ago when I was describing my symptoms to a friend she said it sounded like whiplash.  Whiplash – a neck injury from a sudden forceful change in direction.   It did feel like that.  As if my upper body had been jarred and was now locked in a new position.  The chiropractor I saw even suggested considering a neck support brace.  But I hadn’t been in any kind of accident.  Why the heck would I have whiplash.

I was telling the story to one of my students this week and mentioned the similarity of the symptoms.  She looked right at me and said perhaps it was ‘emotional whiplash.’

She was right!

Seven weeks ago I had made a large decision and was moving forward full speed.  I was seeing where I was going, feeling it in the body and had this immense clear space in front of me.  If you have seen the movie Titanic, I felt like Rose on the front of the ship.   Arms spread and heart wide open.  Leaning in to life.

In other words I was vulnerable.  “I’m flying!”

……and then boom.  While my eyes were closed there was an abrupt unexpected change of life direction. We had hit the iceberg.  The energy of the ‘NO – NOT YET’ hurdled in through my open chest throwing me back and then ricocheted back out through the front.  Leaving me with my shoulders and neck rounded forward and my chest collapsed. 

The word vulnerable has been coming toward me a lot lately.  A word that I know I personally often attach to the word weak.  I reason that if I am strong I won’t have to feel that discomfort of vulnerability and if something should come at me it won’t penetrate my thick skin.  Nothing will hurt me.  But this is all wrong.

A friend happened to send me this link to Brene Brown speaking on vulnerability.  I had watched it before but this time it spoke to me in a different way.  It is well worth a watch. 'The Power of Vulnerability'    

Every time I teach classes on the heart and throat energy I speak to vulnerability.  These are the most vulnerable energies in our body and my famous words are always – When we live with an open heart we will get hurt.  It is inevitable.  I can hear myself saying them.

But…..what is the other option?  A life worth living is lived from the heart.  Through the times of sailing free on the front of the ship, and through the immense grief that comes from the sudden unexpected slam of rejection, loss of loved ones, and the NO-NOT YETs.  Because without the deep hurts you can’t experience the unbounded joy.  When you protect your heart from vulnerability, you also shield it from love. 

So as I continue to improve and heal physically,  I am also freeing up the heart energy in the  front of my chest again.  Rolling my shoulders back and turning on the inner spotlight.  Shining it on all that comes in my path.  Shining it on all of you.  Becoming vulnerable once again. 

It takes incredible strength to be vulnerable,

SARAH