....don't hold back

Yogis,

Recently someone sent me a passage on mindfulness.  It described a practice to use when you encounter a moment so beautiful that you want to savor it. Slowing down. Noticing where you are.  Listening to the breath and opening the senses. 

Then it went on to say -

‘Allow the experience to be as full as possible.  Don’t hold back’

Wow.  Imagine living life without holding back…………………

Oh, why do we hold back so much? 

This life is amazing and is meant to be lived to its fullest. To be tasted, smelled, touched, seen and heard, beyond the obvious and below the surface.  It calls out to us to dive deep but I often sense I am staying in the shallow end. 

Why don’t I dance wildly under the stars, laugh until my stomach hurts and skip down the street through the first spring rain? Lie on the grass under the full moon and eat oysters on the beach at sunset.  Love my body unconditionally, feel the mud between my toes and bear hug the stranger that just lent a hand. 

Our souls yearn for the aliveness of it all.  We can sense its presence, but it so often seems out of reach. Not supposed to. Not adult like. No time. Trapped in the thinking mind looking for distraction and  believing that stimulation may satisfy.  But it falls short in the end. 

‘Allow the experience to be as full as possible.  Don’t hold back’

When leaning in to smell the lavender bush do I dive in with my being. Sinking into my tub, do I close my eyes to allow every cell in my body to receive. Can I shout with joy even when others may hear. Can I be quiet enough to see the soul of another.  Can I ‘lean in’ to life. Every day. Every moment. 

Even the pain I have been experiencing…..can I lean in. Yes, even pain.  Feeling completely what life has placed in my path.  Moving toward healing but not distancing myself from discomfort.  Allowing the experience without holding back. 

I am reading a book of letters by Etty Hillesum and in the foreword they describe Etty’s view on living a full life. Her sense of “………….a majestic stream of life, which includes within itself pain and suffering as well as happiness and joy, and which has to accepted in all of its encompassing depths” 

‘Allow the experience to be as full as possible.  Don’t hold back’

All of this takes letting go.

I want to be in the stream and not watching from the banks,
SARAH