Yogis,
I have an early January birthday. Right
around the time when the hoopla of Christmas and New Year’s has settled down.
The house has been cleaned, the tree gone, and presents are all put away.
Simplicity has returned and now I am being asked ‘What do you want for your
birthday?’ Each year it’s a challenge as I yearn for less. It was January 2020, and I was facing this
yearly dilemma.
Can you remember how you felt that January? We had entered a
new year and a new decade and there was hope in the air. A clean slate on which
we could create whatever we wanted! So it was from that space that I asked my
husband to go to the small crystals shop I had recently discovered to get a
stone for my altar. ‘Tell the owner I am looking for a stone for change’ were
the only instructions I yelled as he headed out the door. I then asked my
parents to get me a book on crystals.
On my birthday I opened a box to find a large….and quite heavy….beautiful
piece of Malachite. A deep emerald green filled with swirls that pull you in and
make it appear different each time it’s near. Ok, now let me look Malachite up!
I turn to the page and the very first thing I see is:
NOTE: This is a very powerful stone and should only be used
under the guidance of a certified crystal therapist.
Yikes!
It went on to describe the stone’s qualities, healing properties
and effects. Finally, it stated that Malachite is ‘the stone of
transformation’. Onto my altar it went. ……Well, we all know what happened over
those next 6 weeks. Not only my life, but the whole world was transformed. And even
though we keep thinking we sense a finish line, eighteen months later the
changes continue.
Lately it feels like one of those flights where you begin
the final descent, all buckled up with tray tables in their upright and locked
position, when the plane unexpectedly changes course and heads back up.
Circling with no clear message from the captain on exactly when or even where you
will finally land.
I am finding it hard to make plans. Should I move forward with changes to the beach house? Should I hold classes in person? Is a warm winter vacation in the cards this year? Will I be able to get toilet paper?............. Where do I even want to land? The uncertainty that comes hand in hand with change. Feeling stuck.
We are always living with change, but usually it is more
subtle, happening under the radar and seeming to sneak up on us. Like those new
wrinkles we catch in the mirror as we rub our eyes open on a Monday morning or
the glance at a wall that suddenly makes it clear a new coat of paint is way overdue.
But what we have all experienced as a collective this last year and a half is so
visible. Affecting every part of life. Does the stone need to go outside for a
while?
What would it feel like to let go and ride the change without a clear destination? To trust the pilot to land us safely, exactly where we are supposed to be? To not have to have a plan. To not know and be ok with that.
I take a conscious exhale, spread my heart open and take the
next baby step forward.
I am paying more attention to my Malachite,
SARAH
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